If #gameofthrones got action figures, each would have to be a double pack with their corpse.
Original post: twitter.com/chrisjohn…
Julie Andrews says, just before shooting a Nazi, “You’re not one of my favorite things” #grittyreboot
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The term “Banana Republic” makes me hungry.
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Sometimes I forget that the “to be or not to be…” soliloquy is contemplating suicide. #Shakespeare
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Robin Hood is a furry convention #DepressingDisney
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The Song of the South #DepressingDisney
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If there’s a movie about it, there’s another ten movies about it. #moviefacts
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Can you be happy, and not know it? #raffi
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A commercial just said the skin was an organ. Really? I actually don’t know. #science #dontknow
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If you wish upon Mars instead of a star, can only violent things come true? #mythology #astronomy
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“To be profound is to fancifully state the obvious” - J.G. Pitzmantle III #quotes
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There are 100 trillion connections in the human brain, which is why I think we love callbacks. t.co/rNsxplKD3… #Improv #science
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“I’ve got you buying eggs. $50 grand!” #normalblackmail
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I want to start filming people doing normal things, and see if I can still blackmail them. #normalblackmail
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Peeling the sunburn off your aunt #BadSummerJobs
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“Last one there is a rotten egg!” - A witch #quotes
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Security is important, @TDBank_US. We’d like it if you supported two factor auth. t.co/rby6WYeTn… #SupportTwoFactorAuth
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“You have to make an agreement with me. See the last two episodes of Game of Thrones.” - Guy who just wasted an agreement. #quotes
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“The only thing we have to fear, is fear itself! That, and Nazis.” - why FDR isn’t quoted fully. #correctinghistory
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Who framed roger rabbit? Watch the movie and find out! #adsfromtwentyyearsago
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If fortune can smile, can it also frown? Was Brazil’s 7 - 1 loss fate wiggling it’s hands in its ears and sticking out its tongue? #worldcup
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If luck is a lady, is fate a government employee?
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Galphaxor the mutilator is rising in your third house. Fortune smiles upon you. #astrologywishes
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I want to see the astrology charts when aliens appear in the sky. #astrologywishes
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I’ve been playing Shadowrun: Returns. Instead of ‘Hell yeah’, they say, ‘Whiz yeah’, as if in the future, hell is replaced by peeing.
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