“To be profound is to fancifully state the obvious. “ - Arthur C. Hubbins III #quotes
Original post: <twitter.com/chrisjohn…>
You know, none of the technology promised in those History Channel documentaries from fifteen years ago has come true. #nohoverbelt
Original post: <twitter.com/chrisjohn…>
RT @GeorgeTakei: From a fan in NYC. Proofreading matters! t.co/wR4T7hZPp…
Original post: <twitter.com/chrisjohn…>
If your eyes are a window to the soul, is your nose the chimney? Should I cram presents up there, is what I’m asking?
Original post: <twitter.com/chrisjohn…>
Reading is transformative; without it, you couldn’t be smart while sitting on your ass. #truefacts
Original post: <twitter.com/chrisjohn…>
6 Mind-Blowing Discoveries We Just Made About Famous Art | t.co/DWU02gEgG… t.co/z31ldQUwS…
Original post: <twitter.com/chrisjohn…>
Weird Al’s new album is really good t.co/e0h1l8r7U… #weirdal
Original post: <twitter.com/chrisjohn…>
This site is amazing t.co/oIZtkfQlJ… #starwars
Original post: <twitter.com/chrisjohn…>
I love meta humor. #hashtag
Original post: <twitter.com/chrisjohn…>
RT @alyankovic: It’s official. MANDATORY FUN enters the Billboard album chart this week at #1. Wow. WOW.
Original post: <twitter.com/chrisjohn…>
I never saw I Know What You Did Last Summer, so I can only imagine it’s a movie about swimming and picnics. #movies
Original post: <twitter.com/chrisjohn…>
I was wondering why #GirlTalk hasn’t been sued…Here’s the answer! t.co/VOkASpOuh… I wish he would get sued so copyright wouldn’t suck
Original post: <twitter.com/chrisjohn…>
Have you ever been lying naked in a field and think, “I’ve been robbed,”?
Original post: <twitter.com/chrisjohn…>
I’ve lived, loved, and lpvd, if we’re moving left to right on the keyboard. #keyboardjokes
Original post: <twitter.com/chrisjohn…>
This is funny t.co/MkxVglPeH… damn #clickbait
Original post: <twitter.com/chrisjohn…>
“Whoa, what’s in this vault…ahhhhh!” #WorseMoonLandingQuotes #PowerRangers t.co/TxtXYkpIY…
Original post: <twitter.com/chrisjohn…>
Nope, going to the moon didn’t cure my crippling fear of space. #WorseMoonLandingQuotes
Original post: <twitter.com/chrisjohn…>
This is better than a moon-bounce! #WorseMoonLandingQuotes
Original post: <twitter.com/chrisjohn…>
“Aw man, it’s not cheese.” #WorseMoonLandingQuotes
Original post: <twitter.com/chrisjohn…>
@marcmaron @normmacdonald That was a really fun episode.
Original post: <twitter.com/chrisjohn…>
John C. Beck, author of Good vs Good — Count to ten when a plane goes down… t.co/rq6DxeNYC… this is a good story
Original post: <twitter.com/chrisjohn…>
5 Amazing Performances by Actors Who Weren’t Acting (Part 4) | t.co/DWU02gEgG…
Original post: <twitter.com/chrisjohn…>
I decided to split the difference and cover it with my shirt.
Original post: <twitter.com/chrisjohn…>
I’m on the subway and just realized my fly is prominently unzipped. Do I fix it now and draw attention, or wait until I get home?
Original post: <twitter.com/chrisjohn…>
“I love deadlines. I love the whooshing noise they make as they go by.”
#douglasadams
Original post: <twitter.com/chrisjohn…>